Dilemma

Its the end of Jan 2011 and I'm still stuck in my house doing nothing. Most of my friends had gone to work while some others decided to move on with their studies in UTP and oversea??

I've decided to get a job starting next month since I'm kinda short in cash (not so short actually). But the more I think, the less likely it is for me to go out and search for a job.

Thanks to Nazir, I went to a nearby ESSO station for a job. 

"Keje kosong tu adela dik. Tapi, tggu la akak train kawan awk ni dlu"

So I gave him my number and went home. Now, I just have to wait for him to call and the job is mine! lalala~~

But until now, the call never did came.. (huh??)

***

Here is the thing.. I've got a driving class next wednesday, and something to do next week. Besides, my juniors also asked me to help them train their marching squads. Then, what if I can't get a holiday to pick up my results in March? I could have cycled back to the station and ask them myself about the job but with all these keep popping out of my head, arghh!! HELP!! X(

Frustration

Its been a year now since I carried out my duty back in Prep School. As a custordian, we knew how big and how great our responsibilities were in guiding our form 1 students to become a good man with manners and good values in the future.

Few days earlier, i went through a comment posted by a parent;

Adalah tidak adil meletakkan semua tanggungjawab merencanakan semua kegiatan waktu petang kepada Pengawas sekolah .Saya andaikan semua pengawas adalah kurang pengalaman dalam mendidik anak-anak remaja .Pengawas sendiri remaja yang masih memerlukan bimbingan guru .Pengawas sekolah juga diberi kuasa tidak terkawal akan membawa implikasi yang buruk seperti kes " Buli Pelajar ".

I felt so frustrated yet was glad to learn something from this post. I'm not going to blame anyone here because I realise I also did some shameful mistakes as a normal person and I learnt from my experiences (which is a lot!). But I think parents should know that I personally considered these little boys as my own brothers and it was my responsibility back then to instill moral values and so on for their own good.

Yet, as a male students, we can't expect them to learn everything directly from speeches and reminders from us. For example, when 'student A' did something wrong and no punishment was given, can we expect him to not doing the same mistake again in future? Or we could give him let say some push-ups and a 'slow talk' later on so that he realised that he did something wrong and it shouldn't do it again?

Also, there are differences between bullying and teaching someone. We knew our limits back then and everything that we did was meant to teach, not to harm. If not, why did the school even appointed us as prefects and trust us in guiding your children in the first place?

"our only intention was to teach, not to harm"

When I was around 5 years old, I went to my neighbour's house to play despite my late father's order to not to. When I came back, he was waiting for me at the front door with a rattan in hand. Without hesitating, he hit me several times just so that I knew it was wrong to turn back on your parents order. From this, I believe that sometimes punishments are the best choice in teaching someone. Because people learn from mistakes and that is one way to show that they did something wrong.


Before I end this, let me share with you another story behind the Prep School. We got a comment from I don't know who but saying that the prefects weren't doing their job. How can we do our jobs when we don't have the chance to? If, you know what I mean.

My writings here wasn't meant to anyone. But I really hope that we could think about it for a while for our own good.

Seize the day will you?

"Seize the day or die regretting the time you lost
It's empty and cold without you here, too many people to ache over"

"a melody, a memory, or just one PICTURE"

from A7X - seize the day

Long ago, I believed that cameras weren't that useful to me since I wasn't the guy who loves taking pictures to be put inside an album etc. I prefer to keep those good memories in mind rather than keeping them inside an album.

After a while, mum got me a Canon Digital Ixus and told me to snap pictures of my batch and my beloved college since it was my last year back then. I brought it along with me to Malay College and do as I was told.

Now that I realise when I wake up in the morning, I'm in my room. Sleeping for hours in bed, ALONE.

No more seeing Menol struggling to memorize historical facts, Rizman making a new map at the mattress, Sifu and Alan doing their 'things', Affwan with his 'sexy lips' gossiping, Abby being teased by me, Sheh doing his push-ups, Harrith carrying books around, Amar doing his readings on his bed and Moon loitering around with his SE phone.

"As time passes by, regrets for the rest of my life"

from A7X - second heartbeat

Luckily I had a cam to snap all these moments. If only I ignored and reluctant to take out my cam and push the 'capture' button, then I would live a life full of regrets without any pictures to hold onto and relived those precious moments of us, the sixten together.

guys, if u read this,

then i really want u all to know.

that i missed u guys so much.

hope to see u guys again someday.

reliving our days back in college.

precious moments together will always last forever.

in our hearts.

as "our bond will last forever".